What I Learned From My 3 Year Old Tomato Sauce
Mr Moo, my dog, gets very excited when I start rummaging around in the pantry or the fridge. He sees me lifting things up, checking the use by date, and it either gets put back or goes in the pile – his pile. It’s written all over his face and I can well imagine what he is thinking: “Oh yeah, I’m in for a treat tomorrow!”
I’m a bit fussy when it comes to use by or best before dates. Even though the logical side of my brain tells me quite loudly that manufacturers put in a buffer and one simply wouldn’t get food poisoning after consuming it a few days past the date. I’m also a plain eater. It’s rare for me to have sauces etc plastered over my food.
So it was with some surprise last night that I cooked my dinner and had a strong yearning for tomato sauce. Out came the bottle and I happily started spraying the stuff all over my food. I ended up having some dinner with my tomato sauce; not some tomato sauce with my dinner! And it was delicious!
After finishing my meal, I sat there thinking how nice it was and I should have tomato sauce more often! The bottle is sitting right in front of me, so I pick it up, flick it over and suddenly the best before date jumped right off the bottle. Oh no. 11th January 2009. I’m thinking, “This must be some kind of mistake!” All that tomato sauce has gone to my head and I’m on a high… I’m hallucinating!
But nope. My tomato sauce was almost 3 years past its best before date! Yikes! How did that get past my inspections? My inspections I have been carrying out since… well, forever. I’ve missed this bottle for 3 years?! How can that be?
Before I knew it, I felt sick. Never mind that 5 seconds ago I was thinking it was the best darn meal I’d had all week. Never mind that when I was eating I was thinking it was the best darn tomato sauce I’d ever had. No. Forget all that. I’ve just eaten 3 year old tomato sauce for crying out loud!!!
I rush to the bin to destroy the evidence; throwing the bottle away will hopefully make me feel better. I hurriedly put the dishes in the dishwasher so I don’t have to look at the red stuff that is left on my plate. None of this works. My dinner feels heavy in my tummy and I can taste the awful sauce (yes, I know, it was beautiful not long ago). So I scoff down some liquorice to get rid of the taste. That worked.
I sit down and am sure my stomach is going to rebel any time soon! Then I couldn’t help but laugh. What a lot of nonsense! The tomato sauce didn’t taste any different – in fact, it was normal. It tasted wonderful. So the slight sick feeling in my tummy and the bad taste in my mouth was all mind over matter! So I just imagined in my mind that the bottle really said 2012 not 2009. And voila! I felt fine.
So I started thinking about that bottle. Why had I missed it all this time? And why did the date reveal itself to me that day?
Maybe my spirit guides kept me from discovering the bottle and waited for a time when they knew I would benefit from my experience and the lesson it provided. After some reflections, I realised that I am procrastinating with something in my life and, after thinking about the tomato sauce, I came to a decision that it was a ‘mind over matter’ thing and I just need to get on with it!!!
Maybe my spirit guides nudged me into having the tomato sauce so I could also share my experience and thoughts with others because someone, somewhere, would relate to the lesson and get value from it at a time when they needed it.
The tomato sauce gave me a valuable reminder that life can be a bit like my experience with that sauce – where I felt mildly ill when, in fact, I was fine. Sometimes we have feelings or thoughts that are, quite simply, mind over matter. Our brain is so powerful and if we allow it, it can give us an illusion or perception of things that aren’t necessarily true.
This is when it can be valuable to put on the brakes and ask:
- “Is this a mind over matter moment?”
- “What is real and what is perceived?”
- “What would happen if I totally flipped my thought or feeling of _________ and took it in the opposite direction?”
- “How do I now feel?”
Even the simplest and seemingly unrelated events that happen in our life are presented to us for a reason and a lesson to learn.
I’m grateful to my tomato sauce 
Release the Feelings
I call this my Bubbles Exercise that I recommend to coaching clients when a feeling or memory is hindering their progress.
It’s okay to feel the feelings and learn from them. But when a feeling or memory is holding us back from claiming our goals and dreams, this exercise can be helpful in letting go and moving forward.
First step is to get yourself a bubble blowing kit – the kind that kids play with You can pick these up quite cheaply and easily at your local supermarket or you can make your own.
Next, with a notebook or journal at hand, find a sacred place. This could be in your backyard, at your local park – wherever is comfortable for you and where you feel you won’t be disturbed.
When you get to your sacred place, set your intention. Setting your intention is really important to do. Ask yourself: “What feeling / memory do I want to release? What is this feeling / memory holding me back from?”
Hold those answers in your mind, and then start blowing bubbles. As your bubble forms, imagine that feeling / memory being locked inside that bubble. Your feeling / memory that is holding you back is now inside that bubble… floating away. Or perhaps the feeling / memory is locked inside the bubble and suddenly the bubble pops and your feeling / memory pops along with it.
As you see your feeling / memory float or pop away, allow yourself to let it go. Allow your body to do whatever it wants to do when the feeling / memory is popped or floats away. If you want to cry, cry. If you want to shout, shout. If you want to scream, scream. If you want to laugh, laugh. Just let the emotion out that is associated with letting go of the feeling / memory.
If you feel no release at all, close your eyes and once again set your intention. Then blow your bubbles and observe them until you feel the release.
When you have felt the release and feel that your feeling / memory has been set free, sit down and take the time to reflect and write in your notebook. Ask yourself:
“How do I feel now this feeling / memory has been released?”
“What gifts did this feeling / memory give me?”
“What did I learn from these gifts?”
“Now that the feeling / memory has been set free and is no longer holding me back, what do I want to achieve?”
“To make my goal a reality, what steps can I begin today?”
7 Ways to Accept Yourself for Who You Are
Accepting yourself and your situation in life can be a difficult task. Do you tend to be more accepting of others’ mistakes than your own? If so, you’re being too hard on yourself!
Those people aren’t better than you! You were created with a unique set of talents that no one else has. Plus, everyone makes mistakes. We’re only human!
Becoming more accepting of yourself and loving yourself for the fine person that you really are can lead you to greater happiness and a more fulfilling life.
Here are some excellent techniques you can use to help you better accept yourself:
1. Focus on your positive qualities. Even though self-improvement is a good thing, it’s important that you identify and focus on your positive qualities, rather than concentrating on the qualities you feel negatively about.
- Maintaining this positive focus will not only help you better accept yourself, but it’ll also make it easier for you to attain your goals by utilizing your talents to boost yourself forward.
2. Consciously prevent negative thinking patterns. Negative thinking can really snowball fast if you don’t get ahead of it. It’s okay to be in a bad mood every once in awhile and have some negative thoughts; it happens to everyone. The trick is in learning how to push those negative thoughts aside and replace them with something positive.
- Replace your negative thoughts about yourself with affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements that affirm your positive qualities and help bring out the best in you. You can find affirmations in bookstores and on websites, or you can write your own. You can also download some positive affirmations and self-reflections on my site:
- I Am The Body In Motion That Stays in Motion
- Giving To Others Makes Me Rich
- If you believe in yourself, you can do it. It’s really that simple.
3. Accept your imperfections. Another part of being human is having some imperfections. Instead of dwelling on the things you can’t change, accept them for what they are. Making the best of your life starts with accepting your imperfections.
4. Use positive self-talk. Positive self-talk can help you achieve great things and change the way you think about yourself. Make it a point to give sincere compliments to yourself.
- Compliment yourself for the good things about your looks, your positive qualities, and every time you do something right. Do this each and every day until it becomes a habit.
- Recommended reading: “What To Say When You Talk To Yourself” by Shad Helmstetter:
5. Disregard what other people might think about your decisions. You’ll never make everyone else happy. If you try, you’ll soon discover that, not only will other people still be unhappy, but you’ll also be exhausted and unhappy yourself.
- Make your own decisions according to your priorities and be confident that you’ve done what is right for you.
6. Avoid worrying. Worrying will never help your situation. Rather than wasting your time by being engulfed in fear, take action to do what you can to make the situation better. If there’s nothing you can do to change it, focus on moving forward in other ways.
7. Try your best and accept that you’ve done what you could. Do your best every day and be proud of yourself for your efforts. Let go of any negative thoughts, such as being angry with yourself for not being able to accomplish an impossible feat.
- Even when you haven’t done your best, find a way to forgive yourself. Move on and commit to trying harder next time.
In changing the way you think about yourself, you’ll also change the way you see the world. Every day opens up new opportunities for you, and by utilizing positive thinking, you can make a real difference!
Reprogramming Your Brain To Conquer Any Goal
Do you feel like you are always talking yourself out of success? As soon as you start to set goals for yourself, do you suddenly have nagging thoughts about how you aren’t up to the task or how you simply aren’t qualified to carry it through?
If you have ever experienced either situation, you need to change the way you respond to your inner dialogue. Instead of obeying your negative commands, you can use positive self-talk to counter the negativity and overcome nearly all anxious thoughts.
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Setting Goals and Sticking to Them with Positive Self-Talk
Are you initially filled with excitement when you first set goals for yourself? Are these thoughts then followed by self-doubt and self-defeating thoughts that stop you in your tracks before you even get started?
It can be difficult to make the most of your life when you are constantly talking yourself out of being a success. It can be frustrating and discouraging to have these thoughts constantly plaguing you. Many of us, in fact, don’t even realize we have them! All we know is that we don’t have the confidence to stick to our plans and reach our goals.
But there’s another way!
Positive self-talk is an effective way to set goals and ensure that you stick to them, even if you have never been able to do this before. The way this works is that you decide what goal is important to you, and then you plan the logistics of how you are going to attain this goal. When self-doubt starts kicking in, you will respond with affirmations that prove your success without surrendering to the negative pressure. Since you’re reading this article, it’s clear that you’re no quitter and you’re certainly not a failure, so start believing in yourself!
Re-Programming Your Brain
Affirmations are essentially positive statements that re-program your mind for the positive. The moment you have a self-defeating thought you’d be able to counter the negative with a motivating statement. An example of a positive affirmation is: “I am worthy of great success,” or “I am in the winner’s circle.” What this does is replace negativity with thoughts that will help you move toward your goals instead of further away from them.
Positive self-talk is easier to implement than you might think. You may not be aware of the severity of the negative dialogue currently within your mind. However, once you begin with positive self-talk, you will suddenly realize that you are self-sabotaging the goals you set for yourself from the minute that you make them. This process can open your eyes to exactly how much this inner conversation has been interfering with your life. You’ll feel hopeful that you can now set goals and surpass them.
Through positive self-talk you will be able easily set long and short-term goals for yourself. And when you use affirmations, you’ll have accessible tools to help you push yourself further than ever before. Learning to quiet negativity with positive thoughts is a great move toward setting and attaining future goals with ease.
