How many times have you been confronted with an urgent project that needs to be completed “ASAP”? (Whether you’re working for yourself or working for a boss!) Or it may be something else in your life when someone has asked you to do it “today”.

How do we define “today” and “ASAP”?  What is your concept of time compared to the other person who is putting in the request?

Unless clarification is made on the deadline itself, stress is the ultimate outcome.

Let’s take the example of Mary.  Mary was called into her manager’s office at 3pm and asked if she could urgently put together a PowerPoint presentation for a last minute meeting with the Board of Executives.  Her boss outlined what he wanted and at the end of the conversation he stated he needed it ASAP.

Mary’s definition of ASAP was straight away, so she galvanised into action and immediately started re-organising her workload to accommodate her manager’s request.  Given it was 3pm and she needed to get it completed that day, Mary rang a client and cancelled their 4pm meeting; re-booking into her already tight schedule for the next day.  At this point, Mary is starting to feel the pressure.  She has a dinner date with a friend at 6.30pm and she knows she won’t make it.  So she calls the friend she hasn’t seen in two years and cancels.  This makes her feel a little cross.  Next, she re-organises her workload for that afternoon and, with regret, realises it will have to be done the next day; meaning she will have to work at least 3 hours overtime tomorrow.

Mary’s shift in concentration has changed. So instead of taking the usual four hours to put together the presentation, it has taken Mary a good six hours.  But on completion she feels satisfied that she did it ASAP and the presentation is delivered to her boss at 8am the next morning.

When Mary delivers the presentation to her boss he is amazed at how quickly she got it done.  “My goodness, Mary, I didn’t mean I needed it by 8am this morning – the meeting isn’t for another two days”. 

If Mary had asked and clarified the deadline, the stress and re-organisation would not have happened and she would have kept that dinner date with her friend.

So how do we clarify and take the ambiguity out of the conversation or request? We need to get the other person’s perspective on what the deadline really is and take action by asking.

For example, when Mary’s boss said he needed it ASAP, Mary could have responded by asking “By what time and day do you need it?”  Her boss may have said by 5pm tomorrow – giving Mary the extra time she needed.

However, you can take it even one step further by reframing your question and clarifying even more.  For instance, Mary’s boss stated he needed it for a meeting which had cropped up.  Mary could have asked when that meeting was, and her boss would have stated that the meeting wasn’t until 5pm in two days time.  To which Mary could have suggested that she deliver the presentation by lunchtime on that same day. This would have given Mary the opportunity of juggling her workload in an appropriate timeframe and reducing her stress levels.  At the end of the day, everyone is happy because the “true” deadline was met.

When you take away ambiguity, ask and clarify, you can alleviate your stress levels and define the other person’s sense of urgency.  This also makes for a more harmonious working environment.

This timely topic was inspired from a TeleClass by Paul Litwack, the Capability Improvement Coach®, www.the-coach.com

Article by Tara West © 2008 Tara West.

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You’ve eagerly bounded into your home office to start your day, and suddenly there’s a knock at the door and Betty, your mother-in-law, has popped over for a chat and coffee.

With a sigh you let her in and sit through an hour’s worth of idle chatter, her words passing in one ear and out through the other as you mentally sift through the work you want to get started on today.  And of course, because of the hold-up, you’re now going to run late with dinner and the quality time you want to spend with the family once your business work is done.

Does this sound familiar?  The same scenario most probably plays out with your friends and the next door neighbour. 

They mean well, but they just don’t GET IT that you’re not at home to receive visitors and chit chat all day; you’re at home because you’re making a legitimate living!

What’s happening is that you are not setting clear boundaries, and when your boundaries aren’t voiced people are not aware of them; you tend to get trodden over and feel a whole lot of anguish and anxiety over someone’s actions.

So, are you running a business or are you running a hobby?  If you’re running a business, then you would have a clear idea of what your hours are, when you are working, and so on. Are you someone who likes to just “run with the flow” and get your business done whenever, or are you someone who likes to work, say, in the mornings and between 2pm and 4pm? To ensure you achieve what you want to achieve in your business, it’s really important you understand when you work at your best and when you are committed to working. Sometimes this can also be dictated by your target market and / or your clients.

The next step is to take responsibility for those hours and let everyone know of your unavailability during those periods.  This is clearly stating what your boundaries are, so the next time Betty or the friend or the neighbour unexpectedly visits, you won’t feel so bad when you say “Oh, you know what Betty, I would love to sit down for a chat, but like I said the other week, I’m working between X and X and it’s really important to me.  Can we catch up after I finish work?”

When you’re working at home, turning away people you love can be a challenge; you don’t want to hurt their feelings right?  But when you voice what your boundaries are, and it comes to a time when that loved one has crossed the boundary, it creates a safe and gentle environment where you can remind them of your unavailability and then extend an invitation to visit when you aren’t working.

Your clients, your family and, eventually YOU, will thank you for it!

Article by Tara West © 2009

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